When Times Collide
by phoenix-ashes
Summary: What happens when the Weasley twins create something that can take them and the HP treo back in time to the Merauders. And what if one of the treo finds romance in the past and a merauder relizes something's wrong? Humor and pranks!
1. Prlogue

A/N: It's my first attempt at a fan fiction like this. Have fun! By the way, the prologue's just an introduction, it's the only one that's NOT funny.  
  
Prologue  
  
Forces United  
  
"Oy, Harry, Ron, Hermione! Over here!" Fred and George's voices called to them as they passed. The crowd had slowly dwindled away, and Harry, Ron, Hermione, and the Weasley twins were the only ones left in the common room.  
  
"What?" asked Ron, glancing at the bits of parchment and ingredients that littered the table before Fred and George.  
  
"We've done it!" exclaimed Fred.  
  
"It's brilliant!" added George.  
  
"What is?" Ron asked, picking up an odd silver contraption.  
  
"That, my friend, is the key to our future success," explained Fred.  
  
"Yeah," George agreed. "We can travel in time!"  
  
"We? All of us?" A sudden idea had struck Harry.  
  
"Well yeah. Why do you ask?" Fred looked ecstatic at the thought of an idea to test.  
  
"My dad. He was--like you, sort of. I think we should go back and meet the Merauders."  
  
"Hang on!" said Fred. "What does your dad have to do with--"  
  
"My dad WAS a Merauder," Harry explained. "But anyway, do you think..."  
  
"Harry, what would you tell your own dad if you met him?" asked Hermione. "You look exactly alike!"  
  
"I could be a transfer student from... Norway," Harry told her. "And you could be from Spain and Ron and Fred and George could be from Whales--"  
  
"C'mon, Hermione! You want to meet his mum, don't you?" Ron asked, almost accusingly.  
  
"Right then! Let's go!" said Fred. "How many years--"  
  
"Twenty years," Harry told him firmly. They all reached out to touch the silver object. George spun a dial, and they began to spin. Moments later, quite dizzy, their feet hit the cold stone floor of the entrance hall.  
  
"We've done it!" muttered Fred in awe.  
  
"Sorry, er-- who're you?" Harry gaped. A twenty-year-old younger Remus Lupin stood, staring at the five students before him.  
  
"We're transfer--" Ron began.  
  
"Hang on! James, I thought you were upstairs with Sirius!"  
  
"I'm not James!" Harry told him, smiling.  
  
"Oh. James, Peter, Sirius! Look! Transfer students!" Lupin seemed in an oddly good mood.  
  
"Excellent!" said James,slapping Harry on the back.  
  
"Brilliant!" supplied Sirius, grinning.  
  
"Erm... hi?" Peter muttered, stepping back into the shadows.  
  
"Well, where will you be in a half hour?" asked Sirius hurriedly. "We're about to play a joke on the Slytherins; we can't talk really--"  
  
"Are you?" asked Fred.  
  
"Need any help?" asked George, grinning.  
  
James beamed at the twins, and without answering, beckoned the group down the hall, whispering secretively about the plot against the Slytherins.  
  
A/N: So now we get to start the fun part! Leave a review if you have any ideas for pranks (or just to review so the next chapter will be put up) 


	2. Snape's Slur

A/N: Thnx to all my reviewers! I've been at camp for three weeks and kind of forgot what the prank on the Slytherins was supposed to be, but... I'll think of something as I go. I never thought this would be so popular!  
  
Chapter One Snape's Slur  
  
James, Sirius, Fred, and George had just broken into particularly loud peals of laughter, and Ron was smiling broadly, though slightly lost. Harry was only half paying attention, when Hermione elbowed him hard in the ribs.  
  
"Look!"  
  
"Oh, no, it's him!" Harry whispered. His heart was starting to pound. The future Snape would recognize him and know what they had done. Was it illegal? But it's not like he could get punished for what he did now. "Fred, George, James, Sirius, Re--" The name Remus felt weird on his tongue. "Remus. Look--"  
  
"Snape!" Sirius hissed. Gliding down the hallway, dementor-like, Severus Snape approached. He glanced around at the group, suppressing his nervousness.  
  
"I don't know who you are. I've never seen you before," he spat at the five newcomers.  
  
"You wouldn't," said James loudly, stepping forward. "Seeing as you don't know much to begin with."  
  
"I know more than you think!" Snape hissed, his eyes glinting maliciously.  
  
"Really?" asked Fred. "I would hope."  
  
"I know that--" Snape stopped to consider. "Never mind. Who are you? A Weasley, I suppose. The state of your robes--how pathetic--"  
  
"And you must be SNAPE," George cut in. "I can tell. The hair, you know. And they thought Iraq had loads of oil in it! Tell me, were you a motor michanic in any past life?"  
  
Snape's lip curled. "A strand of my hair is worth about as much as your family fortune, I daresay."  
  
"You know, I've got a question!" Sirius interjected loudly, anger flickering briefly in his eyes. "When's your birthday?"  
  
"My birthday, Black? January 3. Why ever would you ask?" he said with sarcastic politeness.  
  
"Just wondering," said Sirius casually. "Only I was hoping I could get you a present. You know, some shampoo, a washcloth--"  
  
"A nice, big can of deoderant, maybe." James supplied.  
  
"Alright," Snape said cooly. "As long as you don't ask any of those Weasleys to help. They'd starve for a month. And the werewolf..." He paused and glanced meaningfully at Lupin. "Well, he doesn't look like he could give you much money too readily either. Just stick with Potter, because the rest--" He trailed off. The faces of James, Sirius, and Lupin had gone sober with anger and shock. A pink tingue was creeping over Sirius' cheeks, and James looked ready to kill. Slowly, he raised his wand.  
  
"Say it again," he spat. "Say it again, I dare you!"  
  
"Stick with Potter. The Weasleys and the werewolf wouldn't be of much help," he said clearly.  
  
"You bast--" Sirius began. He was cut short, however, by a birst of yellow light. Snape was lying on the floor, clutching his stomach and looking ready to vomit.  
  
"Stop," he breathed.  
  
"Stop," Sirius repeated.  
  
James ended the spell but kept his wand pointed at Snape.  
  
"What's wrong?" he asked Sirius.  
  
Sirius muttered something in James' ear, and he grinned. "C'mon," he said concisely, and the others followed him back toward the Gryffindor common room, slightly bewildered.  
  
"Wait, but what about the Slyther--?" Fred inquired, apparently disappointed.  
  
"Oh, we're not doing anything to them anymore. Not now, at least," explained Sirius, grinning.  
  
"Our new target is HIM!" James added with poorly concealed hatred.  
  
"Er... target?" asked Ron, who had been shaken by the appearance of the Hogwarts Potions master.  
  
"No worries, Little Bro. We'll get him for you, and we won't get caught!" said George consolingly.  
  
"I'm not scared of him. It's just--"  
  
"He's an ugly git. We know. It's okay." Ron smiled weakly.  
  
"So... er... what are we going to DO to him??" Harry wondered aloud.  
  
"We're going to get him some shampoo, of course!" said Sirius brightly. "Just like we promised him!"  
  
"Do you really think we'd lie to an old school friend?" asked James sarcastically, flashing a grin.  
  
"What will this shampoo, er... DO?" Ron interjected tensely, though a smile played across his lips as he waited for an answer.  
  
"See, what you've got to understand is that we want to make him less greasy," explained James.  
  
"And if it wasn't there," explained James. "It wouldn't be dirty, would it?"  
  
"You're not making Snape go bald!" piped up Hermione, speaking for the first time since they had left the Gryffindor common room.  
  
"Hermione's right. Don't you think we could be a little more orriginal?" asked Fred.  
  
"That's not what--" Hermione protested.  
  
"Sure, if you want!" said Sirius brightly. "What do you suggest."  
  
"I suggest," answered George. "That we give him one of our Snackboxes. The old ones. The ones that give you boils on your--"  
  
"Yeah!" answered Fred. "Along with a nice toffee!"  
  
"A toffee?" James repeated dubiously. "What, the kind that make your mouth turn colors that glow?"  
  
"Good idea! But--" Fred started.  
  
"They make your tongue grow huge," said Hermione hurriedly. "But I don't think--"  
  
"They mmake your tongue grow! Brilliant!" exclaimed Sirius.  
  
"This should be good!" muttered James distractedly.  
  
I had never liked them, and today was no different. So it was no wonder I had "accidentally" hinted to the newcomers that Lupin was a werewolf. And some of them were Weasley Trash! What did it matter if THEY knew, anyway? They weren't important enough to care...  
  
I sat down in my usual spot at the Slytherin table, anger still glinting in my eyes. I glanced over at the Gryfindor table, where all nine of them were sitting together, smiling and looking over at me with malice. I was used to it. It didn't matter. I saw them get up and creep toward me. My anger increased.  
  
"What now?" I asked roughly, sneering.  
  
"Whoa, Snivelus! Don't get all mad like that!" Sirius cooed. "Hey! What's that in your cup?" He seized the full goblet from in front of me and examining it, tilting it so that the candlelight glimmered off the surface of my pumpkin juice.  
  
"Put it down, Black, or I'll tell the whole Slytherin house!" I told him coldly, smirking. Ignoring me, he stuck his fist into the cup in an attempt to draw something other than juice from within. "Look, James!" He passed the cup to Potter. I extracted my want from my pocket and rose from the table.  
  
"But--" Potter began. One of the Weasleys took the cup from him. I blanched at having had such a blood traitor touch a goblet I then had to drink from.  
  
"Give it to me," I spat. "Or I will make you. And it will hurt!" I didn't mean it. I would get the thing back from them by magic if I had to, but I couldn't make it hurt. Not taking the cup, anyway.  
  
"Only you would," muttered a second Weasley, staring into the pumpkin depths as if he were a Divination master.  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?" My annoyance was beginning to get the better of me, but since when had I cared?  
  
"Oh, nothing. Here you go, Mate." He passed the cup once more, this time to the black-haired boy, the one who looked unnaturally like Potter.  
  
"Give it here!" I hissed.  
  
"All right," he said smiling. "I think it was a cockroach or something, but it's gone now. Just flew away..." Knowing he was lying, I took the cup from him.  
  
"You're not scaring me, you know," I told him. "I'll drink it all right now and won't even stop!" So I did. I drained the goblet in one gulp. And immediately knew something was wrong. I couldn't breathe. They had killed me! I knew it! "You'll pay!" I hissed. "If I die, you'll pay!" My tongue and mouth could barely move to make the words. It was as if my face were paralyzed. With what was probably my last remaining strength, I wiped pumpkin juice from my upper lip and nose. "I'm warning you!"  
  
A/N: Haha! Cliffhanger! Review review review, and 1: I'll snend you an E-Cookie, and 2: You'll get your next chapter, cuz when people review I 1: like reading it and 2: Feel special. And I know this has nothing to do with it, but luv ya camp ppl! 


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